Day 143: Wha.. ?

Sometimes coming into
A new world
So buzzing, puzzling, dazzling
I don't know where to turn to
I don't know who to turn to
I don't know what, when
And don't know why
Can someone lead me?
Guide me?
Hide me?
Take this pain away.
Far away.
Away.
Just away.

Maybe it's just because
This new swirl conjures from me
Indifference?
Insignificance?
Pointless malignant mannerism?

No cigarettes, have I started from way ago
Now, l'il cigarette, with a puff 'n two I go
And with three, four, and more numbers mowed
Tension and anger ... then the first pack I just towed
Into my bag pocket
There, in you go!
Lighting up like a rocket
Discreet, with my lips they meet
Puff, puff - there you go!
One, two
More in you go!

But what assistance,
malignance,
indifference
do you bring, oh bringer of
Wooziness
Dizziness
Haziness
And Jazziness..

My mind cannot take it
Nor face it
Evade it
Avoid it

My conscience just takes it
Faces it
Fails to evade it
Or avoid it
All together
As one, together
More together
Together, together

Puff, puff
One, two

Puff, puff
Three, four

Where do I go?
Where do we go?
What more do you want, world?
What more do you want?

I am sick and tired of your inevitable hardships
Inevitable they are, I still spit from my lips
These thousand blights and thousand threats,
Oh I cannot, cannot, cannot
Cannot!
Blight me,
Fill me with sorrow,
For 'morrow, and its 'morrow,
Fill me with anguish
Unquenchable and Everflowing
Evergrowing

And then again, oh beautiful, oh!
I'm always thinking of you
My eternal worry
Can't stop thinking of you

Touch me in the morning
And last thing at night
Punish my mind and body
You know it feels right

Take a little higher
Tell me what you're feeling
Tell me what's happening
And why, why, why

We can only understand what we are shown
How was I supposed to know our mutualism would grow

Move a little closer, lady
Things sure are looking up
Kill me with your one, two
Three and four
I want you so much
I need you so much

Then again, why do you bring me
Bring me these tears
Tears of unidentifiable origins
Schmorigins, Morigins,
Why
Why
Why

I'm in pain, but nobody knows
Are you in pain? Nobody knows
Why don't you open yourself?
Nobody knows
A closeted bookshelf
Nobody cares
Open,
Open,
Now or never
Moreover, Never Ever

A teardrop,
One, two,
Invisible, Unseen
three and four
A cracking
One, but not two, three nor four
Anguish and gnashing
Five, six, and a lot more
The eyes,
Blink one, two, maybe three and four
But the heart
Once, but not twice, thrice or more

Help, help
Listen to my cry
I plead, and I plead
but will I not audibly cry!
Listen, listen
Listen to my cry
I'll plead, and I'll plead
Listen to my cry

I plead and I plead
Listen to my cry
With bloody knuckles and tired knees,
I cry and I plead on my hands and knees

Why? Why?